CR spoke with psychotherapist Peter Mockford



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Peter: If it is a case of an emergency, like a panic attack, what you need to be able to do is get your brain back. The trouble is with a panic attack and with huge levels of anxiety, your brain just goes to mush; you're kind of swamped with feelings and emotions and that's very frightening and dangerous. One of the things to get yourself back into your head is, I know this is going to sound very odd, but take a large sniff of smelling salts or albas oil, because if you can stimulate your physical system, it changes how your brain reacts, and you'll find you will get your head back very quickly, but I have to say, that's only in a case of emergencies. Albas oil is better than smelling salts by the way.

Heather: Someone once said that the only constant thing is change. Is it important to come to terms with that and not try and control things to keep them the same?

Peter: I think one of the most important things is, yes there is going to be change all around, but we have got to stop trying to see our security in things being ok around us. We need to develop our internal security in ourselves, so even if the environment changes, actually we can adapt and change with it.

One of the things I find fascinating with my other role as a vicar, is that Jesus was very good at doing this. He continually talks about pouring his spirit within us, and he gives a relationship of love and security. It's like if you knew you had a relationship you could always trust inside and if you felt kind of panicky you could talk to someone and internally that would give an incredible sense of security, so I love the Christian faith when it comes to this stuff.

Heather: How do you handle change personally?

Peter: Well, it depends what kind of change. I'm good at certain kinds of change and not good at others. I guess the thing I find that really helps me, is just taking a few minutes each day to just be really still, to know myself and to have a chat with God about it. I find that really helpful for me personally. I often look at the day and say "Ok Lord, I have got this coming up, this could change, this is unknown, but somehow God I will make it through with you, and we'll see what happens and help me to take the right kind of decisions".

Heather: That sounds very wise, I think I might adopt that myself. What are some of the other lessons that you have learnt personally in experiencing change?

Peter: I think the great thing about change is that it opens up great potential. Most of us view change as something negative and, "Oh dear, this is awful, something's going to go wrong, and this has changed, it's not going to be the same" - no it isn't, but also I think the great thing about change is that it always opens up new potential. Every time you get change or change happens, sometimes we just have to look at it and say, "Ok, how can this develop? How could this be good?" So instead of seeing it as something frightening and terrifying, see it as something that opens up new options.

Heather: So finally, if somebody's reading this and they're are going through change right now and they are struggling with it, what would you want to say to them?

Peter: What I really want to say to them, is talk it through with someone who is prepared to listen to you, who you trust, and actually share it, because it is much, much healthier with anxiety to share it and to get another perspective on it. CR

The opinions expressed in this article are not necessarily those held by Cross Rhythms. Any expressed views were accurate at the time of publishing but may or may not reflect the views of the individuals concerned at a later date.