Heather Bellamy heard John Lawson's story.

John: At times it was deeply traumatic. In Christ we're forgiven and the past is gone, but I have to keep repeating it, because I get invited to share my testimony all the time. It's really important to share your testimony, but we must always share the gospel message with the testimony. After all, those passages in Revelation speak of, 'They shall be overcome by the power of your testimony and the blood of the Lamb.' The blood of the Lamb is the message of the gospel, so those two things must go together.

When you have to keep talking about the past, if you're anything like me, when you're talking about your childhood or memories, you see them in pictures. I've had to learn to live with the fact that I have to share this stuff, but I'm also fully aware that I'm forgiven.

I'm still very ashamed of the past though. It's amazing how many Christians say to me, "You shouldn't be ashamed now, you don't have to be ashamed, you're all forgiven." Well, I think the day that I stop being ashamed of the things that I've done in the past is the day when I've lost my faith. I should always be ashamed of the things I've done and yet in that fully accepting that I'm a new creation and that I am forgiven. That guilt attached to the shame has now completely gone.

With writing the book though, there were times when it was hard to remember certain things and speak about them. Even today I was sharing with a couple and it got to a certain point and I had to stop and just get hold of myself, because I was talking about things that I would really rather not talk about. It's all filth and rubbish and fluff anyway, but what it does, it highlights the darkness, which then glorifies the light and takes people on that journey, to show them where God brought me from. So I'll continue to do that until the day I die. I will always share my faith and how God rescued me from that dark place.

Heather: How can people buy the book?

John: You can order it from any mainstream bookstore or online shop. They may not all have it in stock, but they can order it for you.

Heather: Finally, you've touched on the fact that you go back into prisons now. Why would you go back into prisons, when that's where you've come from? Why do you not want to get as far away as possible from prisons?

John: Because I know that there are so many guys in prisons that have no faith, hope, or future. The statistics in this country are up to about 60 to 75 per cent of men will reoffend and go back into prison within two years. Yet when a man comes to faith that statistic drops dramatically.

I was preaching recently at the church of that Pastor in Dunblane and with tears in his eyes he said, "I remember when John first walked into that Bible Fellowship and my first perception of him was what an arrogant man. To hear him preaching the word of God today has brought me to tears."

Four of that group of 12 in the prison fellowship are now in full time ministry serving the Lord. To me that's an amazing fact. That a man can go in as a criminal and come out of prison changed and become a positive impact on society, because of what Christ has done for him.

So I have a burning desire to go back into the darkest of places and take the light of Christ in there. Also, the guys give me a certain amount of respect. They will give me their ears because I've walked in their shoes and been in prison. They can catch a glimpse of how Christ has changed me, a glimmer of hope in Christ and I pray that that's enough for them to take the journey that I took and come to know Him as their Saviour as well.