Tom Brock opens his heart

Tom Brock
Tom Brock

We have recently celebrated father's day. I was blessed that I was able to have both of our children with us along with our grandkids. It was a good day overall and it was fun to have them all here.

I find that fathers day/mothers day are funny times for me. Both of my parents are gone. They died several years ago, so I don't really have any responsibility in acknowledging 'parents' on either day. I do have my mother-in-law, whom I love and also love to tease about our relationship, but that's another story.

Sometimes it brings mixed emotions when those days roll around. My birth father died when I was only six months. I never knew him. My mother remarried when I was three. John was the only father I ever knew. I think he was a courageous man. He married a widow with three children; two young teenage girls and one little boy; like I said pretty brave.

I always called him dad and really never thought about my birth father till years later.

Later on my brother was born and we pretty much were the family from there on out. Both of my sisters got married and moved on with their lives and we formed a new family base with two boys.

Our family had its ups and downs over the years. My father suffered with a drinking issue, which eventually ended his life. My teen years were a struggle, I wasn't the easiest child to raise and as I got older I discovered more and more that I wasn't John's child. My last name was different and my brother took a prominent role in John's life, (which he should have done). I made a lot of choices that were not the best for my journey, but the Lord was guiding and in spite of my stupidity life went on.

By the age of 17 I was on my own. I had just about finished with high school when my parents were forced to move away. I stayed in California and finished school, but from there on out I was on my own.

For those of you who know a bit of my testimony, it was then that I began to minister, picking up hitchhikers and the story began to write itself.

Suzie and I were married in 1975 and our first child was born in 1977. I became a dad! I remember saying to myself, 'I will never abandon my child. No matter what, I will stay the course and father my child. I want to be a good dad.'

In 1980 our second child was born and our family was set. Again the thought of commitment to the kids rang loud in my heart. I knew what it meant to be without a father and I would never allow my kids to go through that.

I think we did ok; both of our kids have grown up and found wonderful partners and have given us amazing grandchildren. They do post on Facebook that we're the best parents in the world, so unless they're lying I guess we did ok. You would think there would be more kudos for the best parents in the world, wouldn't you? They are both in ministry and love God, (which isn't always easy in ministry) and have found their way in life and in the Kingdom.

As I look back I can see the lack in my life for not having the investment of a father. There have been very few people in my life who could, or would tell me 'no', when it came to life decisions, (thanks Ray). To say the least I made some pretty poor choices as I journeyed; many I think that have handicapped me and stopped me from reaching things that I think I should have done, but by the grace of God, I'm still here.

I think this is why Suzie and I feel such a commitment to the young ministers/ministries that we work with around the world. We see the importance of investing into lives to give all the support we can to bring safe borders to those who are on the journey of life.

We see the apprehension from some who are afraid of being controlled or manipulated. We see the results of abusive 'parents' too. We also see the destruction that comes from isolation and the harm that comes from having no input, becoming your own place of resolve.

I like to say this, 'don't believe everything you think, as it may not be true!'

We need to have parents in the kingdom. I'm not talking about some weird system where we are part of a cult of accountability that tries to control us in inordinate ways. I'm talking about people we can go to; people we can talk to; people where we can get information about life. We need people that have no agendas attached to what they give; people who care about the will of the Lord and the purposes of the kingdom, over their own desires.

I pray for fathers and mothers like that all the time. I pray the Lord will supply to this generation men and women who will commit themselves to them, to see them go further forward in the things in the Spirit than we have seen or done; people who won't abandon the children.

Malachi 4:6 says, 'he will turn the hearts of the fathers, then he will turn the hearts of the children'. We need the fathers to turn their hearts and make an investment of life. We need the curse broken so we can have children grow up and produce the fruit of life that will really bring life to all who taste it. We can do this if we make a choice to invest ourselves and not hold back.

Years ago I was sitting in my living room; I was going through a very difficult time. I remember thinking, 'I really need to talk to my dad', but he was gone and there was nothing I could do. It was a horrible feeling. The natural things of this earth speak of the spiritual things of life. We all need to speak to our Father sometime.

Those of you who are in the position to invest into a younger generation would you turn your heart to the young and those of you who are young would you turn your hearts to the fathers? We need to have the curse broken; we need to eat of the fruit of what God ordained. We need to see life and we can all be part of bringing it about. CR

The opinions expressed in this article are not necessarily those held by Cross Rhythms. Any expressed views were accurate at the time of publishing but may or may not reflect the views of the individuals concerned at a later date.